Last Words (#20)

This is a story I written for a friend throughout my asasi programme for a game. I had to give her something each month for few months and so I given her a story, that's why you'll see different scenes. Hope you enjoy this quite long essay as much as she did. Something special about this is that I given her the last scene during our like prom/dinner, the night before everyone left to go back home after graduating. She said she cried at the end, hmm.. you be the judge. Enjoy. 

All she could remember was the booming of the music thumping and thudding and the wild flickering of neon lights. The musky smell of sweats, the aching flashes of lights, the loud techno music were all so familiar to Cassie’s life. As usual, on a Saturday night, she and her friends were out clubbing till the light start to rise back in the sky and she will once find herself crashed, drunk on an unknown place with a massive migraine and an upsetting stomach.

                       But something different happen will happen later. She was dragged out into the alley behind this London club that she had already forgotten the name by a guy with dark hair and a darker pair of eyes. Giggling and laughing uncontrollably, she followed. Pinned to the graffiti wall of the alley, the lad with tattoos and piercings stuff his tongue down her throat. Still giggling and clearly high on some drug, she played coy, teasing him by refusing to continue on. But the guy didn’t stop, rather he start biting her lips, holding her tighter by the wrist. She felt the sudden pain, and some of her sanity and rationality were cleared, she tried to pushed him away, telling him that she was uncomfortable and in pain.

“Don’t be like that” the man teased. “It’s more fun this way” He began pulling her head closer to his with force, whilst kissing her.

                      “Stop it!” she cried louder and louder. However, the people around her were busy lip-locking and trading secrets of their genitals to even bother answering to her cry of help. She thrashed, pushed, punched the assaulter, but she was too weak and unable to fight off his strength. But it only made matter worse, he grew inpatient and aggressive, as he slapped her across the face and whispered in her ears to not to move. He began ripping off her blouse and pulling down her skirt forcefully.

With tears running down her cheeks, regret and fear painted across her face, she knew she would soon be a victim of a rape. She sobbed and cried louder wishing to have never come here in the first place. As the man rubbed his hands over her skin and slowly undressing her, suddenly she felt free. The tight grasp on her wrists were gone, the sloppy kisses disappeared.

                   Clogged with tears, she forced her blood-shot red eyes to open and she saw the man was on the floor with his hand over his bloody face. She was shocked and relieved but then she fear started to rise within her, as another man grabbed her by the shoulder. He wore a solid green T-shirt and paired with a pair of jeans and a grey hoodie. She was out of words, she had been rescued but for what? To be raped again? Plagued with fear and full of tears, her mind would not process the words the man said afterwards.

“You’re safe now” his Englishman accent stood out. “Run”

She examined his face, and found herself puzzled and thankful. He had emerald green eyes, thick eyebrows, short classic cut blond hair, dimples and a red moist lips. She was in a trance or in shock – she didn’t know. The man repeated himself and she finally able to process it, and she ran, away from her rapist and her hero.

Few months later.

Cassie’s has turned over a new leaf after her previous shameful incident that fortunately did not happen. She had cleaned herself up and stayed away from her old days of being a drunkard, a drug user, smoker, and strip her bad girl side and threw it away like old garbage. Now, she has new friends that encourage her to do good deeds and are very helpful and kind to her. She has made up with her parents after years of quarrelling and running away from responsibilities. With a degree in her mind, she is more focused and determined to change her whole life around.

But first, she needs to go on a quest. To search for the man who had saved her. Saved her from being rape and saved her from being a bad chick for the rest of her life with no goals and no hope. She knows it would be impossible to track down a single man who she only met once with no name, picture or even a starting point to begin with. But somehow, she knew that she owned this man something other than the fact that he changed her completely. 

“How are you going to find him?” Sarah asked sarcastically. “You should just let it go, Cas”

“Don’t listen to her Cas, it’s destiny!” Hannah said whilst chugging down her bottle of beer.

Cassie was pacing back and forth pondering. She had paced across the living room for so long that the floor was about to have markings of her trail. She couldn’t figure out how she could find this man. “You lot, try giving me some ideas for a change” she addressed her mates.

“Have you tried remembering what he looks like? Or maybe what he was wearing. Maybe, that could help” Sarah suggested whilst staring at the ceiling, lying dead on the living room sofa.

                She thought it was a good idea and tried remembering her worst memory. Flashes of scene flooded her mind; the rapist fondling her with force, the tears and cries that no one saw, the aching pain she felt around her wrist and hips, she tried to push away all those negative thoughts and focused on the man who rescued her. Gradually, she recalled, he had green eyes and blond hair, and when he bellowed for her to run, he had a familiar accent in his tone. “You’re safe now!” “Run!” she repeated those phrases in his tone multiple of times to detect what accent he had. Again and again she mumbled the phrases like a psychopathic patient who had lost her mind. Her friends had gave up in asking what she was doing and began chatting about a guy Hannah met in uni who had the body of Tom Daley.

                “He’s from Brighton!” Cassie shouted out of the blue, almost giving her friends a mini heart attack. “Or at least, he was raised there”

                “Bullocks, Cas. You almost gave us a stroke” Hannah snapped at her.

                Cassie didn’t waste any time explaining and continued recalling what else she could have missed the first time. She remembered he was wearing green T-shirt that had some words printed on it, she squeezed her eyes shut as if it would help her to remember.

                “God damn it, what was it?!” she yelled but to no one in particular. Suddenly, her mind started to become clear, the blurred slowly like a puzzle stick to one another and form a readable picture. “It’s a bloody universities’ emblem. University of Brighton” That’s where he was studying or had studied before, she wondered. She was thrilled and filled with enthusiasm; she had a location, a scope, a starting point into finding him. She jumped up and down, danced silly moves with a beaming smile across her face.

                “What’s effing wrong with her?” Sarah asked with her eyes squinted at her embarrassing friend indicating she was clearly judging her. “She’s obsessed”

                “She’s in love, you bitch” Hannah slapped gently across Sarah’s shoulder and continued gulping the cold beer.

                “Bitches” Cassie jumped on the sofa in between the girls who laughed and pushed her away. She had a sneaky smile and eyes protruding with happiness. “How about a road trip to Brighton uni?”

                “I am not getting involved in your impossible quest of finding your one true love. Don’t even think about it” Sarah replied.

                “I’m don’t really like the idea of going to Brighton” Hannah muttered softly to herself but both of the other girls could obviously hear her.

                “Come on” Cassie persuaded. “There’ll be hot guys there”

                “When do we leave?” Hannah stood up and said with a giggle. 

Next Scene

Cassie and her friends went to Brighton uni and after few seemingly hopeless days of wandering the university compound she finally saw him.

She saw him first, wondering whether she got the right guy or not but seeing the familiar emerald green eyes that were fixated and so absorbed in his book had assure her that he was the guy. The guy who had save her, not only for that incident but for her life as well. Dressed in floral grey T-shirt and a cherry red hoodie paired with a pair of casual blue jeans, he sat on the park bench, reading a book that after squinting real hard, she managed to guess the title, Leaves of Grass. A man of excellent taste of literature and poetry.

                Minutes have passed that seems like seconds, and Cassie was still hiding behind an oak tree spying on him. She enjoyed looking at him from afar, observing a few of his habits like how he likes to play with the end of the pages with his fingers, how he bites the lower part of his lips every now and then and how romantically irresistible he is sitting there.

                “What are you doing, Cassie?” she asked herself pathetically. “Now, is your chance, to get the guy. So for god-fucking-sake, get out of your shitty-hiding-spot-that-isn’t-really-fooling-anyone and talk to him” her inner self getting angrier whilst spitting out wise words in her mind.

                “Alright. Ok” she managed to breathe out the words. She was preparing herself, her legs were moving at place, her palms sweating and she was heaving heavy breaths out of her mouth. Then, finally she moved. She pried out of her weak hiding tree and slowly swayed towards him with as much elegance and demure looking as she could possibly portrayed at that moment. She was moving closer now. Ten more steps. Five more steps. Two more steps. She was standing awkwardly in front of him, dropping her shadow at him, disturbing him from reading.

                She stuttered. Words wouldn’t form. Her mouth was dry, her voice seem to disappear out of the sudden like her courage that she mustered moments ago. Then, he raised his head to see who was intruding him at this fine evening which made matters worse. Awkwardness had overcome the situation and as he gaze into her eyes with a look of bewilderment and an expression that she couldn’t recognize. Slowly, her voice came back to her and she was able to utter a single weak, “Hey”.

                An awkward silent followed afterwards as he was still staring at her with content and confusion. Then he finally said something. “I know you. You’re that girl in the alley that night” 

They had a normal conversation which at first was awkward but they both shared some chemistry together. He made her laugh, she made him smile, and they were enjoying each other company.

“I’m really sorry but, I have class in a few minutes” he said with a smirk. “But I want to do this again”

“Me too” she giggled.

Next Scene

It was a secret. She was just told to bring extra clothes; casual and a night dress and to be ready anytime today. He was mysteriously cunning, trying to plan something unusual for them to do together. She woke up with a smile, a genuine smile and felt excited to see him, to be with him and honestly to know what he actually plan for them. She got dressed in a printed pink T-shirt, denim jacket, maroon colour chinos, and a pair of yellow sneakers. As quick as she wore her outfit of the day, the doorbell rang.

                She run to the door but stopped to look in the mirror and fixed her hair, pulled down her shirt and checked herself out hoping she would impress him. She breathed a heavy breath and walked to the door then opened it. There stood a man dressed in a dirty green buttoned up shirt matched with a pair of dark pants and sandy brown high tops. She couldn’t help but notice his muscular body pushing through the buttons perfectly and the size of his biceps made her quivered with lust, if she could just know if he had washboard abs or not then she would be satisfied.

                “Ready?” he said surprisingly with the most appropriate amount of charm a gentleman would use.

                She nodded and they went out the door.

Riding in his motorbike was thrilling and a window of opportunity for her to get close to him, to touch him. Hugging his torso, gripping hard on his shirt, she got her answer and she was damn satisfied. She didn’t know where he was taking him, he didn’t say. “A magician never reveals his secret” he last said.

                After minutes of snaking through cars and speeding, they finally stop in front of a café. The retro beige coffee shop stands at the corner of the street. She could smell the fragrant odour of coffee and cakes that made her mouth watered with gluttony. Coffee, no tea with a moustache icon at the side was painted on the roof of the shop. Suddenly, he grabbed her wrist gently and guided her into the shop. They sat at a window couple seat and the fragrance of strong bitter sweet coffee grew stronger and overwhelming. The waiter came by and asked what we’ll be having.

                “A frappuchino please” he ordered himself a drink and look at me, waiting for an answer.

                “Umm… I’ll take an iced mocha”

                “And two slices of your famous cheesecake” he added with a smile and the waiter went away.  

                They chatted, they laughed, they talked about their likes and dislikes, as she laughed when he said, “I extremely dislike tourists asking for direction, and to get away from them, I do weird sign languages and they will slowly back away”, then he smiled as he stared into her eyes into an infinite horizon as she shared stories of her childhood memories where she used to play with her mom makeups and draw her face with red squiggly lines and dark liquids and covered her face with thick white powder, ended up looking like a scary ass clown. As the coffees were cold and the dessert plate was empty, he paid the bill and went to the next stop.

                Riding along with him on his bike made her feel comfortable and safe, wishing the moment wouldn’t pass and time would froze as easy as she can do with her wristwatch. She closed her eyes and rested her head against his back, holding him tightly by the waist, feeling each of his muscle clenched and hard revealing his masculinity under the tight camouflaged shirt.

                She didn’t realize they stopped until it did. She opened her eyes to the most beautiful and cleanest lake ever, a tall tree stood at the foot of the lake with a sturdy rope hung on its dark branch; a perfect swing she thought, greenery of grass and trees overwhelmed the scenery, rare fluorescent flowers dotted certain places in clumps, a mountain on the back summed up the mesmerizing beauty of God’s treasure. She was amazed with the glorious view that she didn’t realize that he was undressing himself. 

“Woah, I think you skip the getting me a drink and getting me drunk” she exclaimed as she watch him pulling off his buttoned shirt and exposing his lean and hot body that could melt the ice of her heart. She couldn’t help but exhaled a breath of excitement and thrill.

                “Hah” he laughed whilst bending over and removed his shoes and socks. “I’m not planning to skip ahead. This is still the get-to-know part” His sneakers and socks were off and he stood with a smirk spread across his face as he unbuttoned his pants. “But in a more exciting way” the smirk expressed his cheekiness.

                She was speechless. Adrenaline rushed through her veins as the thought of them together in a closely packed fashion excited her and gave her goose bumps but the good kind like when you’re queuing up for a skyscraper ride at a theme park.  Watching him as his pants slowly slipped down to the ground, she couldn’t think straight. Her mind was blank looking at him almost naked.

                “Well, what are you waiting for” he said charmingly with a cute smile as he stood there only in his dark blue boxer brief. She could finally she him at a full scale, tall and a body to die for, the kind that is physically built but isn’t the body builder type nor the skinny fit type rather the gorgeous looking type that you see on male models. Suddenly, he started running to the lake and jumped and grabbed the rope and swung himself, creating a huge splash of crystal clean water. He emerged from the surface and sleeked his hair back and yelled, “Come on, the water’s great” hiding the shivers in his voice.

                Shocked was painted over her face and a hint of a blush of embarrassment. She had misinterpreted the situation; he just wanted a dip in the icy lake with her. “Oh gosh, I thought you were implying…” before she could finish her sentence, he intercepted her, “What was I implying?” with a look of a slight bewilderment. “Oh. Nothing” she cover herself quickly and smiled as she slowly undressed herself into only her undergarments. Then, she ran and swung herself diving into the lake beside him creating another huge splash. Breaking the surface she exhaled and inhaled heavily because of the stinging cold that shocked her entire nervous system. “Bullocks, that’s cold” she heaved with a shiver.

                He laughed and started splashing her with more water, shocked and slightly angry she splashed him back and the air echoed with their laughter of joy. After a while, they got out the lake and dried themselves with the towels that he brought. “Did you bring your night dress?” he asked whilst drying his blond hair with the towel “Can you put it on?”

                “Where are you taking me, Colton?” dressed in her sleek dark sleeveless dress that touched the ground so effortlessly and gracefully. He was in completed awed when she step out of the tree like a goddess has just immerged herself in front of him. Her brunette curled at the tip flowed down on her right side just above her magnificent boobs. Her face was sexy and cute, with drawn eye shadows, covered with a thin layer of foundation and a hot red lip that made his knees buckled and trembled. Then he began staring at her bodacious looking body. The dress revealed her body figure so perfectly, emphasizing her curves beautifully and showcasing her lean sexy body. His eyes were mesmerized and hypnotized by her beauty that resembles a maiden of Aphrodite.

                When she stepped out for him to stare, she couldn’t help but do the same towards him. Dressed in a fit white with green floral buttoned up shirt paired with a matching navy blue blazer and pants and a black solid tie that made him look undeniably smart and incredibly sexy. With the cheeky smile spread across his face, he was the perfect male figure that she could ever imagine.

                “You look…” he was lost of words and after a few seconds of him blandly staring at her, he finally finished with “beautiful” She blushed and thanked him for the compliment. “I really meant it, like really. I’m not saying that out of politeness or like a gentlemen thing but seriously, you look…” he tried explaining that only made her blushed even more. “Well, you look incredibly dashing tonight” she replied “and I’m not saying that as a polite gesture too. I meant it” she winked and he laughed shyly with his hands covering his white gleaming teeth.

                Then, they got on the motorcycle and drove off to their next destination. Under the silver moonlight and the glowing starry night, she felt happy for the longest time ever. She was having so much fun and the good fun unlike the fun she had when she was choked with drugs and alcohol. She was genuinely having the best day of her life and it was all thanks to him.

                Finally they stopped in front of a massive fountain. “What are we doing here?” she asked but doubting that she will have an answer back. He helped her down his bike and guided her near the fountain as he was searching something inside his pocket. “Wait” he whispered softly as he dug into his pocket and produced a phone and a headphone. He plugged in the headphone and pressed something on his phone and then handed her one side of the headphone. “Now, we dance” he said when the first song played on.

                With the headphone connecting them and their body close to each other as they dance to the melody of a romantic song that she couldn’t remember. They eyes were drowning into each other’s, their fingers interlocked, their body pressed against each other as they glided swiftly across the grey pavements. With the ivory moon and the bright flames dotting in the dark canvas of the night as audience that was watching them dance together till the day end.

Next Scene

“I have something to tell you” he spoke all of the sudden. They were at the lake that they always went to. But tonight, with the stars out illuminating the scenery with its mesmerizing flames and the ivory moon peaking slightly behind the dark mountain at the back shining its silver moonlight on the cold icy lake, made it more breath-taking, and the darkness consuming the whole spot creating an eerie atmosphere, it was magical. They were lying on the tall grass, gazing upon the horizon with lust and amazement. She thought the world was beautiful and life was beautiful with him beside her and she wanted the world to pause.

But, as the words came out of his mouth, her heart skipped a beat, as fear and panic slowly plagued her heart. She propped herself up into a sitting position, breathing heavily the oxygen in the atmosphere. She turned to him, seeing he also has gotten up into a sitting position beside her with his head buried under his knees.

                “Yeah?” she managed to mutter the single word with every worries burdening on the word. Her heart was beating fast, pounding so loudly that she thought it might leap out of her body, her breathing was abnormally quick, and sweats began to bead across her forehead and accumulate on her palms.

                He raised his head out of his hiding spot and stare obliviously into the lake with a look of pain and sadness that she rarely sees from the sweet and jolly guy she knew. He hugged his knees, waiting for courage to take over. His dreamy eyes of emerald began to red as the tears he held back was stinging them. “I’m leaving” he ripped open a wound that she never knew had. His words were direct and serious, unfortunately.

                Shocked, baffled and speechless, she didn’t know how to react or what to say in that predicament. She let the words sink in, and suddenly all the memories of her being with him flashed before her; the joy, the laughter they shared and the adventures they experienced together was soon to be only memories that she will later cherish and hate.

                “What do you mean by you’re leaving?” she was angry and upset and depressed. “You’re leaving me? Or you’re leaving this place? Or you’re leaving this world? Which is it Colton?!” anger began to take over and then she showed defeat when the first tears rolled down her cheek. She stood up straight confidently and glared at him with his eyes still fixed onto the lake.

                “I may be risking all three” he spoke solemnly and paused for a long awkward silence to follow “I’m going to be a soldier”. She felt dizzy and light-headed as if she’s about to fall into a deep slumber and pray that when she wake up, everything would disappear, things won’t be just a dream and words said will be left unspoken and buried forever. Tears were now streaming down her face and her eyes were blood-shot red, her palms were sweaty and trembling. She did not want to believe the words left from his mouth and she didn’t dare to ask to clarify but she swallow her tears and mustered the last ounce of courage and spat, “Please tell me that I hear wrong because I heard you were…” she couldn’t finish.

                He was continuing to stare mindlessly, avoiding looking her in the eyes. Because he knows that if he looks at her, guilt and grief will take over his whole being. Suddenly, as the moonlight fall upon his face, revealing his face and expression that he was hiding all this while. His eyes were burning red with pooled of tears stinging his eyes as he was trying his best to hold them back but slowly, his emotion soon to take over and the first sign of defeat was seen. As the tears started to roll down, he immediately dug his head between his knees, not wanting to show his vulnerability in front of her. On that night, they shared the awkward silence together, neither party wanted to disturb each other, they just embraced each other the whole night, remembering the past as they cried so much that their eyes were dry and they were emotionally drained and they fell asleep in each other arms, for the last time.

                The ray of the morning light rest on their faces, waking them up to the day where they will soon say their goodbyes. She dreaded the day, she didn’t want to get up, she just want to stay with him, cuddled in his warm arms as the sky slowly turns grey and black. “We have to go” he forced the words out whilst propping himself up and holding her in his arms.

                “We don’t” she wanted to say but she nodded instead. The bike ride home was almost too unbearable for both of them. With her arms curled and held tightly around his waist, as she rested her head on his broad shoulder, she thought to herself; this may be the last time she will hold him, laugh and cry with him, or to fall in love with the love of her life over and over again. Past memories flooded her mind, and as soon as she felt the slight blur in her eyes from the tears, she closed them.

                The engine died and the journey ended. She opened her watery eyes and saw that they were at the train station. “Let’s go” he said seriously and took her hand and walked slowly to the train and towards his parents with bags around them. The bell of the train whistled and the announcer called, indicating in 5 minutes he will get on the train and leave.

                She stopped abruptly whilst grabbing his hand. Her head was down as her hair covered her face, hiding her expression. He approached her gently and held her in his arms for the last time. “I will always love you” she croaked into his ears. His arms held tightly around her waist, wanting to let his body remember this feeling forever. “And I will love you forever” he whispered into her ears.

                The train whistled for the final minute and his parents called for him. They broke apart but he cupped her palms and gave a note, “Read this when I’m gone”.

                Watching him getting on the train and moving away break her heart. As the train drove away with her lover and disappeared into oblivion. With the note in her hand, she thought of reading it but finally decided against it because she wanted to keep his final promise.

*Months later*

                Dressed in all black she drove her car under the October rain. When she arrived, she ran out the door under the downpour and stood there, in front of his grave. She stood still for several minutes, looking at his tombstone with the rain soaking her dark dress. Then, she took out the note he gave and finally read it.

                “I still remember the day we met, not the most romantic way to meet your significant other but hey, at least I got to show my rare heroic side of me.

                I still remember the day our hearts entwined when I saw at the corner of my eye, you stalking me, again, not the most romantic way, a little creepy honestly, but I kind of like it.

                I still remember the day we watch the star and our lips curled, now that was romantic.

                I will remember everything about you, Cas, when you’re not here with me and when I come home, we will do more things that we soon will cherish.

                For now, please know that I love you so much”

                The note started to soak and she began crying as her knees buckled and she knelt in front of his grave. And the thought of their last words to each other broke her heart to million pieces.

THE END.